Sunday, September 12, 2010

I glued a promise to my heart

It was hot upstairs, and the sun shone threw the windows.
As the birds outside, perched on their branches, chirped.
And the bees outside, hummed to and fro each pristene white flower on the overpowering bush out front.
The cool air outside rushed in and brushed my skin as i opened the window,
I traveled through the clutter scattered arcoss the floor, and eyed my favorite place to be.
You said it would be alright if i just slipped right in, so i did.
The sheets and pillows held the delicate scent that i was so familiar with.
Closing my eyes, in total bliss, time flew by and before i knew it, that door was swinging open.
"Honey, Im home!" you said as you smiled and jumped my way.
I couldnt help but giggle, neither could you.
Like a pillow you picked me up and squose me tight between those two strapping arms.
We closed our eyes in total bliss.
After an eternitity, we broke our bond.
You held my hand as you showed me how to navigate through the maze of clutter to get to the computer by the window.
Quickly you turned on the song, my favorite song, and smiled down at me as you took my other hand to place it up on your broad shoulder, my feet slid on to the top of yours.
We swayed, i spun, we danced slowly to the feelings held in the air.
You held me tighter when you played the song again, told me i didnt have to worry.
You would stay this close to me forever.
When the song played again, we danced over to my favorite place, you picked me up and placed me on the sheets and blankets.
We listened. Just listened.
And As it played one more time, i couldnt help it, i held on, i held on to you, and i glued that song to my heart, like i had never done before, the tears pooled in my eyes and they fell. Those tears fell to your shirt, you held me tighter, and whispered the words.
"dont let go, i love you... i love you."
I kept to myself, i knew he did, more than anything, but i knew it was so long before anything could even happen. I shut my eyes tight and thought to myself, how hard i would try to keep you that close. You brushed my hair off my face, and kissed the tears. You meant it, you were, you. That one cold september afternoon, you played my heart strings just right, you touched my soul, as we danced.
The song plays around me and i hear it, i remember how i glued the promise to myself that i would stay close to you. I remember. I remember.
And i whisper.
Goodbye, i swear its not for the last time, i know its not easy, this could never be easy...

1 comment:

  1. i love you steff. You are strong, and i know you can do this. you are loved by so many people. including him. never forget it. you are worth so much, and you need the best of everything. some people can't give you the best right now, but they also know that's what you need. i say this to often, but, it'll all work out. i promise.